to surprise is most definitely myself.
after
when I get home, I pour wax into my embossed limbs
impressed with the contours of your solidity
I will make a stencil of you.
don't tilt your head at my absurdity
and don't tattoo your brow with lines.
I know it will be an impostor's arms
wrapped about my birdcage ribs
but at least I can make believe
with your voice distended
across too many miles for authenticity.
as I bastardize someone
I will never really taste, no matter
how comatose we become in each other's
fireside kisses,
the verisimilitude of
us
decays.
we may have slept away the storm, but
clouds have no time for silly things
like dreams or Aphrodite
so that tree in the park died on its side,
roots in the air like splayed fingers.
its body as hollow
as this t o g e t h e r.
impressed with the contours of your solidity
I will make a stencil of you.
don't tilt your head at my absurdity
and don't tattoo your brow with lines.
I know it will be an impostor's arms
wrapped about my birdcage ribs
but at least I can make believe
with your voice distended
across too many miles for authenticity.
as I bastardize someone
I will never really taste, no matter
how comatose we become in each other's
fireside kisses,
the verisimilitude of
us
decays.
we may have slept away the storm, but
clouds have no time for silly things
like dreams or Aphrodite
so that tree in the park died on its side,
roots in the air like splayed fingers.
its body as hollow
as this t o g e t h e r.
it was a fear that settled into satiation like kneading air bubbles out of dough.
that eroded to apathy, then barreled into frustration.
which transmuted into another kind.
lascivious contact, sheets inescapable as quicksand--
i tried to retrieve you.
yelled at a mute huddling at the bottom of a well
only to be met with my own vociferations
that snuck through my tympanic membranes.
needless frenzy. air vents blew warmth into
the enclosed December chill near the ceiling.
(most of us look up to that comfort
and heat rises)
diffused into acceptance.
which caused an overjustification of my
argument.
I lost the case in the end.
that gush of relief that overtook me
the tourniquet lifted, my accomplishments
deindividualized, yet anomalous.
then ladder rungs. up up up
with all my green amorous intent.
I've never been reflective enough to
play up all those spotlights.
then all our doors were agape.
conversations fell. acid rain.
indecisive footing and traveling hands.
in that place I keep returning to.
where temptation hangs out in the circles
that line the fingertips running over me.
and i am so very flawed.
but let's muffle our egos for just this minute
it is so easy to let go
with your hand over mine.
each an oar I cannot retain
for only one stroke.
so I rotate one direction
and back again
floating, at least.
that eroded to apathy, then barreled into frustration.
which transmuted into another kind.
lascivious contact, sheets inescapable as quicksand--
i tried to retrieve you.
yelled at a mute huddling at the bottom of a well
only to be met with my own vociferations
that snuck through my tympanic membranes.
needless frenzy. air vents blew warmth into
the enclosed December chill near the ceiling.
(most of us look up to that comfort
and heat rises)
diffused into acceptance.
which caused an overjustification of my
argument.
I lost the case in the end.
that gush of relief that overtook me
the tourniquet lifted, my accomplishments
deindividualized, yet anomalous.
then ladder rungs. up up up
with all my green amorous intent.
I've never been reflective enough to
play up all those spotlights.
then all our doors were agape.
conversations fell. acid rain.
indecisive footing and traveling hands.
in that place I keep returning to.
where temptation hangs out in the circles
that line the fingertips running over me.
and i am so very flawed.
but let's muffle our egos for just this minute
it is so easy to let go
with your hand over mine.
each an oar I cannot retain
for only one stroke.
so I rotate one direction
and back again
floating, at least.
flop flop
i think i accomplished this year the same way I drink coffee on mornings I don't want to wake up
meaning i keep closing my eyes
and opening them again
and putting my hand on the warm cup
then taking it off again
and drowsing off a bit
until the liquid cools
and all the small amount of sugar settles at the bottom
and the creamer floats to the top.
and then I make ice coffee!
meaning i keep closing my eyes
and opening them again
and putting my hand on the warm cup
then taking it off again
and drowsing off a bit
until the liquid cools
and all the small amount of sugar settles at the bottom
and the creamer floats to the top.
and then I make ice coffee!
